Meet Glock. He's a man's best friend, always in your undapants for all those "just in case" moments. Nifty.

Republicans. What do they stand for? I mean beyond destroying the environment, shitting on civil liberties, and waging war on all fronts? Guns. That’s it. Specifically, the right to carry one under your shirt wherever you want. In all the legislative sessions since the beginning of Walker’s goobernatorial term, this is the ONLY thing they have to “brag” about. It’s been a long fight for these rednecks and they won. But that’s all they’ve done in ten plus months. They didn’t deal with a budget crisis because there is none. They didn’t protect the beautiful natural resources of this state because they’re working tirelessly to hand them out to the highest bidder. They didn’t do anything to strengthen the educational system of this state and subsequently its future because they defunded the fuck out of it. They didn’t bring fiscal sanity to Wisconsin because they made it a distant memory with corporate welfare handouts. Isn’t it funny how redneck republicans always shriek mindlessly about human welfare maggots with ACTUAL civil liberties and need of “handouts” in tough times but they turn a blind eye to this bullshit of corporate coddling? Stupid teabaggers. Wicked republicans. I hope some day they eat their own shit and have to go on welfare to feed their redneck babies. Stupid redneck babies. I hate those disgusting creatures. Their speech patterns and thought processes are fully developed at 3 months of age.

Now I’m going to come out and admit that I’m not really all that fired up about this law in and of itself. I don’t mind guns. I enjoy them thoroughly in fact. I don’t believe there is going to suddenly be anarchy in the streets when people (probably very few) actually begin to legally carry their firearms. It’s fine in and of itself despite its blazing uselessness. What pisses me off is that this has been the only agenda of the Republicans for years… well that and union busting and education defunding and environmental rollbacks and religious indoctrination… but this was a simple straight forward battle and they won it commandingly. Now the redneck voters will cheer about how the grand ‘ol party of racists stood up for freedumb and ‘Merica’s greatness unlike those bleedin’ heart, tree huggin’, faggot supportin’, book readin’ liberals. Scatt Wanker has secured himself at least another 3% of the vote when the recall goes through in the months ahead. Yet the bottom line is this legislation is useless. It doesn’t do anything. It’s merely a smoke screen for the right to pander to their redneck constituents. It’s masturbatory material for the dim that they can now use to throw out there while singing: “See!? You see!? At least Walker did something, unlike that poopie… poop… face Doyle!” Tell you what, teabagger. Go over there by that busy highway. Lay down across the yellow passing line, take a few sips of your Bud Light, and catch your breath. You’re going to throw a fat embolism if you don’t take the time to relax.

"What is that up there? Oh, I'm on? Hey fellow teabaggers. Just wanted to let you know you can carry guns now. That's cool, huh? It's just that... you see... what I mean is... so... so here's the thing. It just so happens I'm afraid for my meaningless existence and am banning it in the senate chamber. Sorry teatards! Freedumb isn't free!"

So here’s the other important thing, not only am I pissed off about this legislative body’s wasting time and resources on pathetic legislation, but I’m even more angry about the bull shit double standard, NIMBY (not in my backyard), hypocritical bullshit that is a tried and true pattern of the Republicans. What am I talking about? I’m talking about this happy horse shit. The Republicans are afraid of their own fucking legislation. How pathetic is that? Fitzie boy doesn’t want guns on the senate floor or in the viewing gallery for that matter. Even their offices will be off limits. What a lame brained pseudo-human that sadistic mother fucker is… and a coward. I’m sorry, but these short sighted ignorant assholes voted for this legislation and they should have to face the “consequences” like everybody else. If people want to arm themselves and stare hungrily at these morons while they work passing more inane laws, then they should be able to do so unhindered by the fear of that blubbering fuck Fitzgerald et al. How can they be all in on this legislation and then suddenly set limits? What are you afraid of assholes? I thought the whole goal of this legislation was to make people feel safer? To create a more secure state? Moronic Republicans. They are all walking ironies. They exhaust me with their stupidity.

Of course, all of this will go by unnoticed by their intellectually dull constituents. The Republican apologists will carry on in undying support of the inanity that is the GOP. They think the Dems are the party of do nothing? How can they turn a blind eye to the Repub-lie/con party? Oh, that’s right. They’re simpletons, just like the wastes of oxygen they elect to represent them. Oh well. Guess it’s high time I got my concealed carry certificate in order to protect me and my loved ones. The zombies apocalypse approaches more with each day these degenerates shamble around. Charleton Heston, help us all! Pow pow pow pi pow!

Peace,

Sturm

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